The Mustaches
Jarrett Ashworth: 164 yards. He was drafted on a medical gamble that three clubs would not take, which the record will now have to accommodate. Out of Lake Chandler, which sends one of these to the league about once a decade. It counts the same as anybody else's.
The ledger, after two seasons: 3,680 yards, sixty-one scores.
He turned twenty-seven this year. He is from Muddy Creek, Kentucky. Around the building he has never been described as easy to coach.
The Mustaches, 0-3, and three weeks gone. Fitzgerald Pumpernickel is new.
He eats the same breakfast every game day and will not discuss it, and always has.